"Attention, Pieces of Shit. Corporate threw a few bucks our way for you scum to do what we like to call 'retraining.' This means you fuck-nuts can take a little R&R at a hot spot like Camden or Bridgeport, pick up some tips on streamlining the assembly line from another factory, try not to get yourselves arrested, and then get your asses back to work here."
Boss-man is such an asshole. Al once lost his cool and called him a "fat fuck" right to his face. Nearly got himself canned.
Later that day at lunch, Al and Fred broke open the Black Domes and hatched a joke. They'd apply for Boss-man's "retraining" offer, but construct an argument for something completely absurd and irrelevant--some sort of "program" that would would have nothing to do with the assembly line and amount to a paid vacation of greed and debauchery for our heroes. Stick it to the man, so to speak.
Al and Fred would apply to...ready for this?...become students at UCLA out in the warm Cali sunshine for a year. Freakin' nuts, right? Who is their right mind would....
You ready for the punchline?
Boss-man bought it. Every bit of it. Hook, line, and wiggly slab of bait.
Here is Boss-man:
And here's where you'll find Al and Fred next year:
Al and Fred have already signed up for this. Oh Sweet Mary, the boys have really pulled off a coup this time!
13 comments:
Ah, So Cal, lovely So Cal
The Bicoastal Boys!
Yooooooooooou Rock!
R...O...C...K
ROCK!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo!
Mindy
ps--does that mean ALL THREE of you boys will be out here in little ol' sunny California?
Dear Al,
I'm not old enough to access that site. What do I do?
Timmy
Dear Timmy:
Go fuck yourself.
--Al
This post is exactly why I look up to my two pals on the east coast. They are pure genius. Freaking incredible. How do they do it? I am lucky to have my boss give me five extra minutes at lunch. These guys have their bosses buying their tickets to the land of poon. I LOVE THEM! I don't think you can call this blog "3 bicoastal boys." How bout "2 gigolos on the east and one twerp on the west who can only dream
You can get a lot done with 5 minutes at lunch.
Just sayin'.
Fuck Timmy.
Mr. Bangorhard,
My mom is going to take away my computer. She caught me looking at the "3 Bicoastal Boys" and says you guys are immature and mean. I also won't be able to play Halo 3 anymore. I'm really sad.
Can you call my mom and talk to her? It would mean alot to me. I could mention you as one of the "Men Who Made a Difference" at my next scout meeting.
Please hurry. Mom's bringing a box up the stairs right now.
Respectfully, Timmy
What - No race results or injury updates?
You guys are getting kind of lame.
Dude, if you haven't figured it out by now, that's indeed what this whole thing is:
Lame.
A big sea of Lame punchuated by sparks of brilliance.
Welcome to the internet.
Do the sparks of brilliance only come around as often as Haley's comet?
It's been a long time since I've been rolling on the floor laughing (ROTFL).
Timmy:
check this out:
http://www.redtube.com/
And tell yo mama to call me. I'll set her right.
Big N:
Lay off the double-sized beef, dawg. That shit leads to hypertension, liver failure, and erectile dysfunction. I used to be there, Homeboy.
fred
Post a Comment