rebutt-AL

I have been doing well lately. Mostly, I'm doing a lot of maintenance fitness work--running base of 25 miles per week with pool and bike workouts mixed in. However, a few nights a week, I do my "basement biathlon." This is a big indoor workout that features 4-5 miles on the treadmill and an hour on the expensive steel spinner. My plan is to continue in maintenance mode for the month of February. In March, I'll start training for a few 1/2 marathons in Spring. In Mid April-early May I'll shift to full blown tri training for the season that will start for me in late June.

Now to other matters...

Today, I received ANOTHER of those unbelievable annoying chain mail emails. You know, one of those fucking "do this list of things and you'll be happy" emails. These dumb shit emails drive me crazy. Some absolute dork in his 5x5 cubicle gets this shit from some "friend" and then annoys the shit out of 223 people on his mailing list by forwarding it on. They always have these "great" subject lines:
Tips for an Exceptional, Superb & Powerful Life

Today's FWD was particularly annoying because it had this underlying "pray and praise Jesus" message running through it.



Now, if you haven't guessed, Al is A-religious. Al would call Al an atheist. Now Al doesn't care what you believe or practice. However, Al can't stand when you tell him what to do/think. Thus, Al decided to stomp a little life-coach ass.

First, Al went into stealth mode. (This involved forwarding the offensive email to a secret email account: stiffone469@aol.com)
Next, Al added some replies to the list of "things to do."
Finally, Al replied to all and sent his thoughts to a few hundred unsuspecting cube dwellers.

The response was overwhelmingly positive. (And stiffone469 was pleased as punch. Don't read on if you're easily offended or find blasphemy/irreverence upsetting.)

Tips for an Exceptional, Superb & Powerful Life:


1.) Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while
you walk, smile. It is the ultimate
antidepressant. Try running instead. It will slim down your fat ass, and you’ll be working too hard to wear a goofy fucking grin. Walk around smiling, and they’ll want to lock you up.

2.) Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day. Buy a lock if you have to. I’d like you to shut the fuck up for much longer than just 10 minutes.

3.) Buy a Tivo (DVR), tape your late night shows and get more sleep. Or stop watching the stupid shows.

4.) When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, 'My purpose is to________ today.'
Bullshit. Want to relax? Try not setting a “purpose” for each day.

5.) Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm, and Empathy. Try the 3 Fs: Fuck off, Fuck you, get Fucked.

6.) Watch more movies, play more games and read more books than you did last year.
And get laid.

7.) Always pray and make time to exercise.
Do exercise. Fuck prayer.

8.) Spend more time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of Six.
Fuck the fogies. Avoid kids under 6 too, unless they are your children’s friends. Then try to be civil while tolerating the whiny little fucks.
9.) Dream more while you are awake. And you’ll probably get fired.

10.) Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less foods that are manufactured in plants.
Oh, fuck. Who is the genius who came up with this one?

11.) Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli , almonds & walnuts. Yeah yeah.

12.) Try to make at least three people smile each day.
And then tell everyone else to go fuck themselves.

13.) Clear your clutter from your house, your car, your desk and let new and flowing energy into your life.
How ‘bout you add some new energy to your life: jump in the tub with your toaster.

14.) Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead, invest your energy in the positive present moment. More fucking energy issues, huh?

15.) Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class
.......but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
Ok asshole, tell me one thing you learned in school that you still remember.

16.) Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a college kid with a maxed out charge card.
Beer and ramen?

17.) Smile and laugh more. It will keep the energy vampires away. What the fuck is an energy vampire? Does this dick work for KEYSPAN?

18.) Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
So true, so true. (Douche.)

19.) Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. I fucking hate this guy.

20.) Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
You say, writing your list of 40 life rules.

21.) You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree. Whoa.

22.) Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present. zzzzzzzzz

23.) Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about. Love the metaphor: life is a journey. Deep!

24.) Ladies - Go on and burn those 'special' scented candles, use the 600 thread count sheets,
the good china and wear our fancy lingerie now. Stop waiting for a special occasion. Everyday is special. Yes, so are you. In the little school bus sense of the word.

25.) No one is in charge of your happiness except you. Which is why I am ridiculing your stupid bullshit.

26.) Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will this matter?' I wish you’d framed this email with those words before sending it.

27.) Forgive everyone for everything. I’m trying. But not succeeding, you dick.

28.) What other people think of you is none of your business. True. But this time I’ll share: you’re an asshole.

29.) Time heals almost everything. Give time, time! How long will the recup be from this email?

30.) However good or bad a situation is, it will change. Amen.

31.) Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch with them. Have you met my friends?

32.) Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful. This email.

33.) Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need. God provides remember?! Then why must I fuck about with green tea and salmon?

34.) The best is yet to come. (in Heaven) Kill yourself and speed the whole thing up.

35.) No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up. Can I skip the undies? I like going commando.

36.) Do the right thing! Unless you’re wrong.

37.) Call your family often. What you call them is up to you.

38.) Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: 'I am thankful for __________.' Today I accomplished _________. And then laugh like a motherfucker at how stupid you just were.

39.) Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed. Or just drink more.

40.) Enjoy the ride. Remember that this is not Disney World and you certainly don't want a fast pass. You only have one ride through life so make the most of it and enjoy the ride then make sure you are on your way to Heaven and will receive a new body in Christ Jesus!
Stop wasting time on stupid emails like this. And fuck Jesus.

annu-AL

In honor of Fred and Wood (both "Big League Catchers"), I am happy to report a VERY important upcoming date:



2/14/08 PITCHERS AND CATCHERS!!!!!!!

Yes, it is that time again. Now there are many of you who will bring up how absolutely debased the sport of baseball has become. You'll say it is a game for cheaters and users, that it's an industry not a sport, that it's a national disgrace not the national pastime. Ok, I hear you. Your points are heard and well taken. But...

There's something about the call up of players. It suggests that Spring is just around the corner. It suggests that Summer will soon be following. There's the excitement of the new roster additions. And this year they are BIG for the Mets! Catchers Brian Schneider and Johnny Estrada will be joining Ramon Castro in Florida. AND !!!Johnny Estrada will be joining Pedro and John and Orlando and the rest of the bullpen. Good stuff. Plus pitchers and catchers day falls on my birthday, 2/14.

Let's face it, all our national and international sports have become debased. Some will choose to discard them. I can understand that. I choose to celebrate the good stuff in them, though. Look what some of the good people are doing right hear at home:

emotion-AL

Al's Mets Ink a Blockbuster Deal. Much celebration at Chez Al.

Al is happy as a pig in shit...

Johan Santana passes physical, Mets and Twins finalize blockbuster trade
By MIKE FITZPATRICK, AP Baseball Writer

Santana and the New York Mets completed contract negotiations on Friday, Feb. 1, 2008, the last major step needed to finalize the team's blockbuster trade with Minnesota. After the sides were granted an extra two hours to work on a deal, they finished negotiations before the new 7 p.m. EST deadline. The pitcher is scheduled to take a physical, the Mets said.

NEW YORK (AP) -- Johan Santana was right there in the room as his agent and the New York Mets haggled over a colossal contract.

After three straight days of negotiating, the sides were $5 million apart -- and time had run out.

Maybe this blockbuster trade between the Mets and Minnesota Twins was going to crumble, just as New York did during the pennant race last September.

"We talked about a worst-case scenario," Mets general manager Omar Minaya recalled, thinking of the team's eager fan base "What are we going to say?"

So agent Peter Greenberg and the Mets asked Minnesota for an extension, a request that was granted by the Twins and approved by the commissioner's office. The deadline for talks was pushed back two hours to 7 p.m. EST Friday, and that was enough time to reach a deal.

"Without that, we wouldn't have gotten it done," Greenberg said.

Santana passed his physical Saturday, finalizing the ballyhooed swap that sent him to New York for four prospects: outfielder Carlos Gomez and right-handers Philip Humber, Kevin Mulvey and Deolis Guerra.

"We've been lacking what we consider a true No. 1 starter," Minaya said on a conference call. "It doesn't get much better than Johan Santana."


All Al can say is

Jingo

Jingo

Jingo

Jingo Ba

Lo

Ba, Ba, Lo

Ba, Ba, Lo

Ba, Ba, Lo

Ba, Lo

Ba, Ba, Lo

Ba, Ba, Lo

Ba, Ba, Lo

Ba

Jingo

Turn this mother up:

El Campeón Hermoso

Now that Miss Hotness has disposed of other-young-up-and-coming-hottie in the Aussie final Moveitfred can now return to the drudgery of his life as well as his somewhat regular programming.




By the way, Sharapova is Russian?


Yes, ok, and Moveitfred is Mexican.

renewab-AL

Hi fuckers. Missed me? Sorry to have been gone so long. Had a little something up the river to handle.

To pass my time over the last month, I've been running 5 days a week to stay fit. Cycling on the indoor toy too. Got to get back in the pool soon. Must make it happen...Feb 1! There. There's a resolution.

And to those of you who thought I was gone for good, I say PAH! It's in my blood...

Brand New Day

Moveitfred knows what he'll be doing Friday night.

Y'know, Moveitfred is down with the whole women's movement and equality and justice and respect. Moveitfred tips his man appendages to the champions who led the fight.


But, whooo doggies, ain't nothin' wrong with the contemporary combatants these days, yo.

(note to reader: 3bicoastalboys will be a women's tennis blog--with, perhaps, a smattering of Mantitties--until the match ends on Friday night. Thank you for understanding)

Sighting

After weeks and weeks of no contact and with individuals continually pestering Moveitfred to solve the mystery and shed some light on the situation, Moveitfred actually both sighted and spoke to Al Bangorhard today.

Moveitfred was able to knock off a quickie photo of Al with his cellie camera, and let Moveitfred just say there was something...uh...different about Al. He just didn't seem himself. Perhaps a changed man, or some such transformation? Moveitfred's not sure.

Al showed up at the factory not quite dressed to code, but besides that what captivated Moveitfred was Al's stories of heroism and adventure from these past weeks.

Apparently Al went all Chris McCandless on us, dropping out of the world of technology and human contact and into a much darker place of spiritual wildness. Al spoke in strings of rambling, garbled thoughts about "federal corruption" and "the temple of his manhood" and "the mysterious vulva of earth." There was also talk of great floods, squalor, and vast expanses of wilderness.

Crazy, weird-ass shit.

In all Moveitfred had a hard time connecting the dots and getting a handle on the whole situation but, regardless, it's comforting to see Al back and feeling good about himself.

Perhaps one day he will even post something on this blog.

Tennis

Moveitfred loves tennis. It borders on obsession for Moveitfred. And what better way to pass the time through a cold NE winter than to religiously watch the action from warm, sunny Australia?

(cycling content)

You want what?

Is Wood way out of line or what?
A few weeks back, the weather in California was rather chilly due to some low pressure system from Alaska. Along with the system came rain, wind, and as previously mentioned, cold freaking air. Cold temps and rain don’t bother Wood one bit. Just throw on the right clothing and he is ready to brave the elements.

One cold morning, Wood and the Chef headed out for what was supposed to be at two hour ride. Let’s make this point clear, a TWO HOUR RIDE. Not gone for two hours. The roads were free of traffic. The air was crisp and clean. Just a splendid day to be riding through the foothills of northern California.

About an hour into the ride, the Chef asked to stop by a gas station for some food. In Wood’s small mind, he was thinking the Chef forgot to munch before he left the house and wanted to consume an energy bar or banana to refuel his body WHILE riding. So the two pulled over at the only gas station along the route. Of course, the Chef forgot money and Wood lent him some money. What are friends for?

Five minutes later, the Chef walks out with a bag of beef jerky, some salty nuts, and a cup of steaming hot coffee. WHAT THE F%CK? A cup of coffee? For the next 15 minutes, the Chef just sipped his latte whatever. What kind of bullshit is this? When asked why he got a cup of joe in the middle of a ride he replied, “Nothing like a steaming cup of coffee to warm the soul,” or some crap like that. How about a hard f%cking ride to warm the soul? With a wife and child at home, two hours is all the time Wood had to exercise this particular day. If one wants to ride and take breaks, go join a bike club. They love doing that shit. Once a month they probably buy the drink for all who attend. But when riding with Wood, it is to ride. Not talk, drink, or make friends with the local celebs. Exercise is the goal, remember? Is this one pet peeve Wood should just try to let go?

2008

With 2008 firmly in our grips, the time has come to start planning the racing/training year. Main goal this year, improve my overall aerobic fitness level. The power seems to be there in short bursts. And technical skills have been my strength, carrying me nearly every ride. What pulls me down like an anchor is my freaking cardiovascular and pulmonary systems or lack there of. Stuffed into my elfin thoracic cavity is the heart of a lab rat and lungs from a 92 year old life time smoker. I pledge to cut the smoking this year and quit looking for cheese all day long. Instead, lots of hours on the bike following a rigid training program.

This was week was Base week 1 and it went down the toilet, literarily. After almost one solid week of training, some stomach bug infected the Wood household and wiped us all out. Shit was coming out of both ends. A liter of saline in the arm helped rehydrate the body since I could not keep anything down.

With two days of moping around, doing as little as possible I am feeling much better. Lets hope week 2 goes much better.

So back the whole racing thing. I have picked out a few races I would like to do this year.

Cool Mtb race, March 9th
Dirt Classic Mtb, April 13th
Downieville Downhill Classic, July 12-13
California Fireman's Olympics

The Downieville race is priority number 1. I am hoping that an enhanced aerobic fitness level will help me with another goal, TO RIDE THE CHEF INTO THE GROUND. I am tired of him chipping his teeth the whole way up a long arduous climb while I am gasping for air. Complete destruction is the only option.

There will also be cyclocross races but who knows what that schedule will look like. I do know that I will be out on the east coast for the world cup race and Glouceter for sure. Fred, get my room ready ASAP!

Back To Cycling Content

Cipo has unretired and will return to the 12 step program.

Sources put him in Cali right now. Keep your ears to the ground for any new developments, Heywood.




















Now here's a guy who outta put his Ball where his mouth is, so to speak.

Winner of the Fitchburg Longsjo Classic with some friends:

Yoga Lessons In The New Year (by Moveitfred)

Moveitfred went to yoga class tonight. Moveitfred learned something. He would like to share it with you:

The Taoist relaxation method is very simple: "Listen to your breathing." Nothing more is needed, except persistence and patience in such listening. If you do not persist, your attention will stray back into anxieties. Be patient; impatience merely adds to anxieties. Patience is an attitude which undercuts the roots of anxiety.

Thanks for reading.

Blow Your Horns

yu-AL

yeah, yeah... Merry Christmas

Last Minute Gift

If you're still stuck on what to get Moveitfred, all he really wants this Xmas is an ipod.

All the best to you and yours this happy, happy, warm, happy season.

TJ's Win

Grab hold of the inspirational, pounding Gladiator music and go buy yourself a Cannondale.

digit-AL

This post could be titled verb-AL too. But I just used that one so...

Anyway, it has been a hard few weeks for the Als. We were supposed to close on our new house last week. We were at the table, but our buyers had a bank document problem. The closing was halted. as a consequence of that, I could not buy my new house, the guy I'm buying from couldn't close on the place he's moving and so on. 5 parties screwed up in that deal. No shit. Dominos! Looks like we'll be moving next week...we'll see.

This all has made my training a bit "scattered" to say the least. I've been slamming out quick 5s in the morning. When I can, I jump on the trainer for a bit in the evening. But as soon as I'm settled, it's back at it in a more organized manner.

And the 08 tri schedule is starting to trickle in. Looks good! I already screwed up though. I've been dying to do the NYC tri. The swim is in the Hudson. It starts up at about 100th and goes down to midtown--DOWNSTREAM. I hear it is really about steering not swimming as the river CARRIES your ass. The rest of the deal is right in Manhattan. Cool. Here's the big BUT: the announcement came out for it at the end of November. I said, "ok, let me do that..." But way lead on to way. Here I am not a month later...I go to the website. Fucker sold out in 1 week. SHIT! Ah anyway, there are plenty of races. More news on my 08 plans as I figure 'em out...

So here's the crux of this post. It's an interesting little linguistic analysis. I shared this with Fred. He wanted no part of my theorizing. See what you think:

"He, like, totally fingered me..."

So I’m on line at the Bagel Boss round the corner when I hear this conversation between the two almost 20 somethings in front of me.

"he, like, totally fingered me"

“No Way!”

Now, let me ask you this, what’s a “total” finger? What’s it being juxtaposed with, a partial finger? Finger fuck with an oral finish? Finger / oral / good ole fuckin’?

Al's theories on “total”:
my thinking is that the “total” here probably refers to one of two things
A) The totality of the act: he fingered her and that, besides some petting and kissing, is all there is to report. (Probably a first time too. This would explain the “no way.”)
B) She came from it. “Total” here describes the depth (orgasm) of her experience. (And I’m still going with the ancillary first time theory.)

One could posit third and fourth theories. These theories would revolve around “total” referring to the level of penetration he achieved with his finger, measured either in terms of knuckles or vaginal cavity. Or “total” referring to a qualitative assessment of the fingering: “totally fingered me” equalling “fingered me very well.” However, I think that these theories—as stand alones—are limited and likely not accurate. My guess is that these operate together as a sub set of the larger “she came” or B theory. In this reading, level of penetration / quality of fingering are related to each other and are contributing factors in the achievement of orgasm. Thus, an unpacking of the language, in theory B, might yield a translation of this sort: “he fingered me so well and so deeply that I achieved orgasm. “

Thoughts?

Say What?

Merry Christmas! First off, let Wood start off by saying Merry Christmas! Or Happy Chanukah, or Happy Kwanzaa, or whatever the hell you celebrate. Second order of business, let everyone in the blogging world who actually reads this crap (MIF and Al) recognize why no posts have been made from the west coast. The Jablome Family has a new arrival. No, it’s not a new-fangled Vanilla road bike, although that would be nice. Not a BMW 745 however, that is on the Christmas wish list. It’s a Baby Boy!

He was born November 3rd weighing in at 8 lbs 15 oz, 22 inches long and is an eating, sleeping, shitting machine, just like his dad. Most importantly, healthy. This is the first child to the Jablome family and many things are confusing Wood.























For starters, Wood is exceptionally knowledgeable with dogs, all household animals for that matter. Potty training the pets was speedy, straightforward, unproblematic, and took only a few days to complete. Sure there was the occasional catastrophe but for the most part it was a great experience. Not so much with the baby. Wood employed the same established techniques that worked on all the pets, rubbing their nose in the shit. Six weeks old and still no improvement. Can someone help a brother out?


Next, the unvarying crying. Wood has been married for over five years, a few of them pleasant. When the marriage was new, Mrs. Jablome tried to cry to get her way. “I want this, waa waa waa, I want that waa, waa, waa,” she cried. Woody doesn’t play that game. He just elevated his voice and told her where the bear craps in the woods. She soon learned. This baby though, is not paying attention to what daddy is saying. He just cries until you feed him. Wood tried the same approach again and he just keeps crying. Does he not understand who is in charge of this family? Is he deaf? How does one lay down the law? Until this is figured out, the Jablome family will just shove food down the mouth until he pops.

Wood does appreciate all the help the readers (MIF and Al) have to offer. Hope Wood is forgiven for his lack of attention given to this blog as of late.

verb-AL

The ‘08 resolutions are beginning to percolate in ole Al’s head. One comes right to the top. Al needs to be a kinder, gentler worker at the factory. One immediate area in need of improvement, LANGUAGE! Al’s a fucking potty mouth.

Here’s what I’ve gotten from H.R. to help me with this problem:



Number 1
TRY SAYING: I think you could use more training.
INSTEAD OF: You don't know what the fuck you're doing.


Number 2
TRY SAYING: She's an aggressive go-getter.
INSTEAD OF: She's a fucking bitch.


Number 3
TRY SAYING: Perhaps I can work late .
INSTEAD OF: And when the fuck do you expect me to do this?


Number 4
TRY SAYING: I'm certain that isn't feasible.
INSTEAD OF: No fucking way.



Number 5
TRY SAYING: Really?
INSTEAD OF: You've got to be shitting me!



Number 6
TRY SAYING: Perhaps you should check with...
INSTEAD OF: Tell someone who gives a shit.



Number 7
TRY SAYING: I wasn't involved in the project.
INSTEAD OF: It's not my fucking problem.



Number 8
TRY SAYING: That's interesting.
INSTEAD OF: What the fuck?


Number 9
TRY SAYING: I'm not sure this can be implemented.
INSTEAD OF: This shit won't work.



Number 10
TRY SAYING: I'll try to schedule that.
INSTEAD OF: Why the fuck didn't you tell me sooner?



Number 11
TRY SAYING: He's not familiar with the issues.
INSTEAD OF: He's got his head up his ass.



Number 12
TRY SAYING: Excuse me, sir?
INSTEAD OF: Eat shit and die.



Number 13
TRY SAYING: So you weren't happy with it?
INSTEAD OF: Kiss my ass.




Number 14
TRY SAYING: I'm a bit overloaded at the moment.
INSTEAD OF: Fuck it, I'm on salary.




Number 15
TRY SAYING: I don't think you understand.
INSTEAD OF: Shove it up your ass.



Number 16
TRY SAYING: I love a challenge.
INSTEAD OF: This fucking job sucks.



Number 17
TRY SAYING: You want me to take care of that?
INSTEAD OF: Who the fuck died and made you boss?



Number 18
TRY SAYING: He's somewhat insensitive.
INSTEAD OF: He's a prick.

despicab-AL

Players named in Mitchell report

Thursday, December 13th 2007, 7:30 PM

A list of players named in the Mitchell report (with 2007 team):

Chad Allen, OF (played in Japan)
Rick Ankiel, OF (Cardinals)
David Bell, INF (last played for Brewers in 2006)
Mike Bell, INF (retired)
Marvin Benard, OF (retired)
Gary Bennett, Jr., C (Cardinals)
Larry Bigbie, OF (played in minors)
Barry Bonds, OF (Giants)
Ricky Bones, P (retired, former Yankee)
Kevin Brown, P (retired, former Yankee)
Paul Byrd, P (Indians)
Ken Caminiti, 3B (deceased)
Jose Canseco, OF (retired, former Yankee)
Mark Carreon, OF (retired, former Met)
Jason Christiansen, P (retired)
Howie Clark, INF (Blue Jays)
Roger Clemens, P (Yankees)
Paxton Crawford, P (retired)
Jack Cust, DH/OF (A's)
Brendan Donnelly, P (Red Sox)
Chris Donnels, INF (retired, former Met)
Lenny Dykstra, OF (retired, former Met)
Bobby Estalella, C (retired, former Yankee)
Matt Franco, INF (retired, former Met)
Ryan Franklin, P (Cardinals)
Eric Gagne, P (Red Sox)
Jason Giambi, DH/1B (Yankees)
Jeremy Giambi, DH (retired)
Jay Gibbons, OF (Orioles)
Troy Glaus, 3B (Blue Jays)
Jason Grimsley, P (retired, former Yankee)
Jose Guillen, OF (Mariners)
Jerry Hairston, 2B (Rangers)
Matt Herges, P (Rockies)
Phil Hiatt, 3B (retired)
Glenallen Hill, OF (retired, former Yankee)
Darren Holmes, P (retired, former Yankee)
Todd Hundley, C (retired, former Met)
Ryan Jorgensen, C (Reds)
Wally Joyner, 1B (retired)
Mike Judd, P (retired)
David Justice, OF (retired, former Yankee)
Chuck Knoblauch, 2B (retired, former Yankee)
Tim Laker, C (retired)
Mike Lansing, 2B (retired)
Paul Lo Duca, C (Mets)
Nook Logan, OF (Nationals)
Josias Manzanillo, P (retired, former Met and Yankee)
Gary Matthews Jr., OF (Angels)
Cody McKay, C (retired)
Kent Mercker, P (last played for Reds in 2006)
Bart Miadich, P (retired)
Hal Morris, 1B (retired, former Yankee)
Daniel Naulty, P (retired, former Yankee)
Denny Neagle, P (retired, former Yankee)
Rafael Palmeiro, 1B (last played for Orioles in 2005)
Jim Parque, P (retired)
Luis Perez (former bullpen catcher for Expos)
Andy Pettitte, P (Yankees)
Adam Piatt, OF (retired)
Todd Pratt, C (last played for Braves in 2006)
Stephen Randolph, P (Astros)
Adam Riggs, INF (retired)
Brian Roberts, 2B (Orioles)
John Rocker, P (retired)
F.P. Santangelo, OF (retired)
Benito Santiago, C (last played for Pirates in 2005)
Scott Schoeneweis, P (Mets)
David Segui, 1B (retired, former Met)
Gary Sheffield, OF (Tigers)
Mike Stanton, P (Reds)
Ricky Stone, P (Reds)
Miguel Tejada, SS (Orioles)
Derrick Turnbow, P (Brewers)
Ismael Valdez, P (last played for Marlins in 2005)
Mo Vaughn, 1B (retired, former Met)
Randy Velarde, INF (retired, former Yankee)
Ron Villone, P (Yankees)
Fernando Vina, 2B (retired, former Met)
Rondell White, OF (Twins)
Jeff Williams, P (retired)
Matt Williams, 3B (retired)
Todd Williams, P (Orioles)
Steve Woodard, P (retired)
Kevin Young, 1B (retired)
Gregg Zaun, C (Blue Jays)