Friday, April 13, 2007

I got a Rash!

Heywood at your service, kinda

With the weather so stunning out here on the west coast, it is pointless to stay inside while letting the body decompose on the couch. So Heywood and Big Cat hit the trail to knock out one of IMBA Epic trails, the South Yuba. With the ladies in agreement to shuttle us to the top, Heywood’s reliable blue truck was strategically placed at Edward’s crossing. The shuttle service, consisting of two fine-looking ladies and an excellent mode of transportation, drove the boys to Highway 20 and Omega road where our Epic was to begin.
Heywood has one small problem that plagues his life while living in the foothills of California. Poison oak. For what purpose did God place this dreadful plant on Earth for? To devastate Heywood’s life? More on this later.
First few miles, a fun downhill ride on fire road to the town of Washington. The folks of this small mountain town believe the Civil War has not finished and are cheering for a victory for the south. Needless to say, the two boys never made eye contact with a soul and rode a quickly as possible to the safety of the trailhead.

While on the trail, the views of the river were astonishing. Water had a beautiful turquoise tint too it while the clarity was truly amazing. The South Yuba trail is a well built trail to say the least. Most of the next 20 miles or so consisted of slow winding single track through the dense foliage of this ecosystem. Nothing too technical to speak off, just not a very fast trail. There are half a dozen stream crossings; most of them have a newly constructed bridge so the feet stay dry. Although the trail drops in elevation overall, there are lots of climbs to get the heart rate pounding away above the lactate threshold. At one point the trail is a few yards away from the river. Then the trail rises a few hundred feet above making for a fun downhill to follow. This rise and fall repeats itself numerous times during the journey. There are also numerous swimming spots along the route. Just a spectacular day on the bike. But, there was one problem looming over the head of the two boys the entire ride. Poison oak. This shit was everywhere. There is no riding around it, ducking under it, or trying to avoid it by any means. This shit was everywhere. Never seen so much poison oak on a trail in all the days spent here on Earth. Now Woody did try to come prepared with Tecnu, baby wipes, and long sleeve shirts but, that just was not enough. By the end of the ride, Heywood appeared to be going into anaphylactic shock. The 3 Bicoastal Boys would have been the 2 East Coast Boys if not for the quick thinking of Big Cat who apparently caries preloaded syringes of Epinephrine and Benadryl in his pack. Big Cat was begging to try mouth to mouth to help Heywood out. Sure glad the Benadryl worked. That would have made for an uncomfortable ride back to the car.

So five hour after starting our trip, we located the truck that had a little surprise waiting for us. Life is good!

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Fahkin' Heywood. Livin' the fahkin' life. Ride the new steed? Got the Dave Thomas hoops on it?

Heywood Jablome said...

Fred,
Yes, I was riding the new steed. It rides downhill like a dream, but not uphill as good as the old ride. The Dave Thomas hoops are on the old ride and will not fit on the new one. One, the rotors on the new bike are larger for better braking going downhill. Second, the new rig has a 20 mm thru axle in front. Both these reasons make the Speed Dream wheels non-compatible on the new bicileta. I ordered the new bike with some sweet wheels. DT Swiss 340 hubs and DT Swiss EX 5.1d hoops. Bulletproof I hope.

megA said...

i really hate you now.

really.

Heywood Jablome said...

Meg,
Why do I deserve that? I love you, I love your blog and your wit. And I support you even though you didn't try to make any contact when you came out here. What gives?

Anonymous said...

Meg, when you gonna add a comment feature to that blog of yours? The bicoastals need a space to cajole. You got the big, fancy degree now. Surely you can figure it out.
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo, Moveitfred

ps, Heywood claims he's coming out for the LI race this year. Better treat him nice or he'll bust open a can of whup-ass during the women's elite. His arms are registered in the state of California as assault weapons, and he has no respect for rules or authority.

Anonymous said...

Holy cripes, Woody. Didn't we establish an agreement that we WOULD NOT post pics from our respective wedding days?

Anonymous said...

The weirdest thing...I was on this ride today as well. I think I saw you two.

At the end of the ride, after the two of you separted from an uncomfortably long embrace, I saw one guy drop to a knee and offer the guy with the ugly rash the beer and then he started to sing....

Blue Moon,
You saw me riding alone,
Without a dream in my heart,
Without a love of my own...

I don't want to talk about what I saw next...

Heywood Jablome said...

Sorry Fred, sometimes I just can't control myself.

Heywood Jablome said...

Anony,
I am calling bullshit. Those things don't happen here on the west coast. That sounds like a Long Island story.

solobreak said...

heywood, you saying the new bike is harder to put in the truck for the ride back up? We have bikes like that out here too. They're called KTM's. Most guys who ride them didn't do well in Meg's class. Speed kills. Play it safe. Be a Fred.

megA said...

sorry boy-o, iweb does not allow for comments unless you buy into their .mac subscription and i don't wanna.

but you can email stergem at hotmail.com and speak to me directly, or my cat, depending on who is using the 'puter.

i'm just jealous that you are warm and boingy out there whilest i am cold and rigid, wait. . .

nevermind