Friday, April 20, 2007

FlashFred

First shorts day for Moveitfred. This annual event is completely outside the realm of understanding for Heywood Jablome, however those of us out here in these parts know. There comes a time in the spring, often swept onto our doorsteps by abrupt climatic change, when we get to strip off the warmers and dance like we've never danced before (more on this clever allusion in a moment).

Moveitfred, off from the factory for the entire day, skipped out on an early group ride and delayed his planned cycling until the noon hour in order to experience the full enjoyment of this glorious day. Of course we also know that first shorts days mean electric white legs exposed for the world to see for the first time in the new year. One must tune out the relentless catcalls from motorists and simply endure the ridicule for a few weeks until the pigments darken.

However this brings Moveitfred to his intended topic this day, one that, ironically, combines material above such as warmers and the striking image of white-hot leg exposure.

Last evening, while settling in for a round of ab work on the stability ball and flipping channels to find some good bun-burning inspiration, Moveitfred experienced a Flashback of gargantuan proportions. There, just starting up on the "Movies that Rock" segment on VH1, was a golden reel from Moveitfred's past: Flashdance.

Flashdance helped shape Moveitfred's world view at a significant developmental moment in his life. From the fluffy mane on that tasty little milkbone Jennifer Beal, to the titillating off-the-shoulder fashion, the warmers, the athletic tape, the sweat, the inspirational 80's hits...the entire package was a 10.

However, dear reader, do not think Moveitfred is stuck in a 1983 time capsule. Moveitfred has matured and is capable of now viewing these cinematic events under a new lens. What Moveitfred didn't remember from the old days is the significant environmental statement Flashdance presents to the viewer. Consider reader: Pittsburgh, steel town, filth, factory exhaust--our protagonist Alex toiling away under the heat of a Quiet Riot mask by day. At night, however, raw human sexuality, fitness, and power.

And--now follow along carefully because here is where Moveitfred ties all the threads together--what visual device allowed our protagonist Alex to bridge these two worlds?

The bicycle.

That's right, the bicycle. That Alex chick OWNED those mean streets of Pittsburgh on her bike. To/from work, a trip to the gym, off to the ballet company--Alex pounded out life with a Gewilli-esque passion for the clean-burning machine. What many remember from Flashdance is only the image of that bucket of water splashing down on our heroine, however what Moveitfred appreciates now is the timelessness of that other important message:

"You work all your life for that moment in time,
It could come or pass you by
It's a push of the world, but there's always a chance
If the hunger stays the night"

If Moveitfred could pass along one message to this confused and yearning world of ours it would be: Embrace the hunger.

4 comments:

solobreak said...

You suck worse than the Mets Fred. I promised myself a computer-free weekend to give my eyes a rest, but there are so many places I could go with this... fucker.

Hugh G. Balls said...

Freddy:
If you're embraced by hunger, why not eat a steaming pile of shit? That is what I recall when I recall flashdance...shit. I'm waiting for your musings on Travolta's magnum opus,"Battlefield Earth" and Lopez's truly inspired, "Gigi." Prick.

Anonymous said...

You homos just don't know art.

megA said...

i bet you look great in a little off-the-shoulder sweatshirt tied at the wasit freddie.

looking forward to seeing that at the long island cross race!

xo
m